Motivate

LANGUAGE LEARNING AUTOBIOGRAPHY

How I started my journey in ELT...

Apart from being heuristic in language learning process, learning a language basically starts with social interaction that occurs upon the communicative needs of the learner and it is supported by reinforcement and encouragement. All these needs are much related with linguistic concepts and the broad theories of this language learning process has been discussed and criticized by many researchers.

“Tell me, I’ll forget. Show me, I’ll remember. Involve me, I’ll understand.” This famous Chinese proverb enlightens my learning journey throughly. Learning a new language is like  to discover a sense in a new world as to me. It is like a puzzle piece but never ending and even after you get the whole piece, you will never satisfy what you get because your vision is all open to explore upcoming and developing language sources. This point of view reflects how I welcome English language as a learner.

My first journey into English language started little  bit late in the mid of primary school years. Then I barely remember that I was repeating every word after teacher and I was greeting her every morning echoing “Good morning teacher, fine thanks and you”. This was totally like repeating every sound like a parrot and fossilizing what I learned as I perceieved or translated into Turkish. After I changed my school with my mother’s involvement, I firstly introduced with an Alphabet song which I had a lot fun in learning that song with my favorite English teacher. That experience was like to catch your baby’s eyes after giving birth at the first time and engaged with her in further. My first  journey to learning English started with my  English teacher’s support and strong reinforcement. Then my anxiety level ran low and I felt highly motivated while learning new topics and my self- confidence boosted. Even though I didn’t struggle too much in learning but I had a lot of fun in  my English classes by involving interactive activities. Then I started high school and I chose EL class as a branch. I was one the autonomous learner in the classroom, I was doing my homeworks on time and handed them in before the due date, involving activities and doing a lot practice with my additional English grammar books. However, It was not enough to put my English level forward because of lack of skilled teacher in our school. It was my ill luck as a learner in language class at school. I could understand how I “fill in the blank questions” but not comprehended what I listened neither I could practice speaking after repeatedly exposed to grammar-translation method.

My greatest weaknesses was being too shy to speak English in public eventhough I had enough vocabulary and grammar knowledge to produce that language responsively. Nevertheless, I hesitated to speak English by being afraid of making mistake. That clearly indicates that how students experience“effective filter hypothesis” defined as in  Kreshen’s educational psychology. This weakness sometimes grabs me even after many years learning and teaching English but it is totally depends upon my level of anxiety according to culture that I exposed to. As a language learner, I believe that prejudges in our culture has an effect on learning and pushes us to afraid of making mistakes indeed. Moreover, this sense is totally diverse in another countries like USA.

After studying intensively English in highschool year through testing methods, I was accepted SUNY dual diploma program in Eskisehir Anadolu University, Faculty of Education in ELT. Here is the place which does not work multiple choice testing and I had to deal with TOEFL exam to go to America and continue  SUNY ELT program in NY.  These two years was my turning point to heal my weaknesses and to confront my challenges. I was taught that I need to learn the language by involving and practicing in real language environment. I had to learn how to write academic writing, how to lead discussion, why do we use phonotic chart, why do we apply more than one grammar book etc. Those all –Wh questions changed my assumptions and beliefs to learning a language. The role of teacher in that case is crucially significant and those questionings shaped my prior knowledge into a new horizon. I made a tough decision and I chose that major to become a teacher. However, to become conscious in my major and aware of its function took a while after three years in America. I have learned a lot about American culture, lifesytle, education system, rules, through the classes that I registered. Those courses leaded me to realize my strenghts as a language learner. Since I was taking some courses such as Modern Maths, General Psy, American History, Geogrophy, American Literature, Painting etc. Then, I have noticed that I could manage my weaknesses after involving the language literally. I could not even feel any anxiety while presenting my lesson plans accompanied with my professor’s video recording sessions or even reflecting my ideas in front of all native students in the lecture hall;  I didn’t feel any low-esteem. That self-esteem and courage gave me the chance of internship in “International Conversation Partner Program” by Prof. Dr. Quaglio ( SUNY Applied Linguistics-Associate Prof). I completely ruined my prejudges to learning English Language and changed my learning style into communicative language learning approach in an immersive way.

My  first step into learning English language actively began with learning how to become autonomous learner. I engaged myself in every input and compelled my self to ask “what my “take away” was at the end of the day , What I have learned and what mistakes I did.”  Hence, I have learned a lot from my mistakes; from false methods such as learning testing instead of understanding, memorizing rules or concepts instead of critically analyzing. As an English teacher or as a learner, I strongly believe that I need to improve my learning&teaching strategies as long as I criticise my weaknesses and reflect upon my beliefs and assumptions to my peers or colleagues.           In addition, living in the USA  contributed me to detect the difference between formal classroom language learning experiences and informal real language environment. I transferred what I learned in formal classroom into real language environment practically. This gave me the change to improve my discourse abilities and to live the culture in personal contact by sharing the knowledge. Practically I enhanced my language skills and made my weaknesses strong. Overall, all those practical experiences helped me to widen my horizon in the field of language acquisition and education.

All in all, I am trying to learn every little piece about the language that I exposed to and I am trying to teach English more interactively and communicatively that the way I would like to learn it by meeting the needs of my learners and engaging them  to become  autonomous learners.